The Stuff You Should Be Buying At Trader Joe's

Truffegeddon dinner at La Toque's chef table was a tough post to follow, so I decided to take a completely different angle for this next one: my favorite cheap TJ's groceries, suitable for eating at home in front of the TV.

I have a short list of grocery products I get at Trader Joe's that consistently garner amazed compliments and urgent inquiries about their provenance.  One of my friends recently asked me to list them all out for her so she too can shop like a ninja there, and avoid the scores of nasty TJs products that lurk on the shelves.  It would take more time than I have today to list all of my picks, but here are seven of my most-loved and most frequently purchased staples, in no particular order:

1.  Kono Sauvignon Blanc ($7.99).  This is my go-to house wine, suitable for any occasion. It's an extremely racy, grassy, Sancerre taste-alike from New Zealand that pairs with practically any food you're having: Mexican, Thai, Japanese, Chinese, French, Italian, Vietnamese... there's enough acid to cut through rich dishes, but also enough Marlborough-style fruit to round out more lean snacks. I love its jalapeno notes, and distinctive whiff of pipi du chat that makes you think you're drinking a much more expensive Loire Valley offering.  Buy this one by the case, seriously.  Though fabulous with most foods, this wine is particularly delicious when paired with item #2, below.

To know them is to crave them.

2. Roasted Gorgonzola Crackers ($1.99). These little miracles put the crack in crackers.  They're kind of like tiny Saltines, if Saltines were hexagonal and dusted in an addictive umami-rich cheese/onion/garlic/yeast/soy sauce powder. I don't care that they don't actually contain any roasted gorgonzola, these things are compulsively delicious, and the perfect aperitif to munch on with a cold glass of Kono. I can't eat fewer than 30 in a single sitting, which is probably why TJ's lists the serving size as 31 crackers. Pro tip: don't ever let yourself snack on these directly from the box.  Also, did you see the $1.99 price?!? You can't go wrong with these.

3.  Tarte d'Alsace ($4.99).  This grande dame of TJ's frozen pizza section has a shockingly delicious puff pastry-like crust, topped with shredded gruyère cheese, julienned ham, and caramelized onions.  I like to cook it directly on the oven rack (put a piece of aluminum on the lower rack to catch the runaway cheese and oil that frequently escapes and makes a huge smoky mess on your oven floor), and bake it about 2-3 minutes longer than the directions recommend.  This crisps up the crust nicely, yet still keeps it pliable enough to fold around a green salad.  One tarte serves two not-too-hungry people (not four, as the package claims), but you can always add a fried egg on top of each person's piece to round things out in classic French style.  It makes for a tremendous and très chic dinner in 15 short, effortless minutes.

4. Fennel ($1.99/2-pack).  Fennel is not particularly well-known in the US, but I'm doing my best to change that by feeding it to everyone I cook for.  I mostly eat fennel raw in salads (it's awesome in a salad for the Tarte d'Alsace at #3, for example) or crudité platters, but I also love it cooked.  Pasta con sarde is one of my favorite ways to eat sauteed fennel, and buying this two-pack is the way to go if you're making a big vat of that delicious fennel-spiked sauce.  TJ's has the best price in town. Sadly, not organic though.

5.  Port Salut Cheese ($9.49/lb).  This French cheese was originally created by monks in the dark and crazy days following the French revolution, as a way to sustain themselves during the chaotic anti-religious sentiment of the period.  Those savvy monks obtained trademark protection once they realized how amazing their cheese really was, and now we have Port Salut in nearly every grocery store in Napa -- but TJ's has it cheapest. Semisoft, mild, but with an addicting tang, this cheese melts well and can be used in pretty much any situation involving cheese. I love it with the aforementioned Gorgonzola Crack[ers].  I also like to use it in toasted cheese sandwiches with sliced apples, or Pumpkin Butter (another fantastic seasonal TJ's item).

6.  Arabian Joe's Thin Crust Spicy Spinach Pizza ($3.99 for 4 pizzas).  I bring these little pizzettas to the office for lunch a lot, and torture my colleagues with their delectable aroma.  The olive oil-rich dough is spread with plenty of spinach cooked with garlic, spices, and green onions, so they actually have quite an impressive nutritional value as well as an intoxicating scent and taste.  For years I topped these with a dab of TJ's stellar eggplant hummus, a slice or two of pepper-crusted roast turkey deli meat, and a handful of arugula -- which I then folded up and ate like a giant taco.  That is still one of my favorite ways to eat them, but I'm trying to branch out. They're fantastic on their own, really, and need nothing except a few minutes in the toaster oven to unleash their full depth of flavor.

7.  Espiral Vinho Verde ($3.99).  This dubiously-priced Portuguese wine is a summertime staple for pool parties and barbecues.  It's a vinho verde, so don't expect buttery richness or 15% alcohol -- think vodka tonic, with a lot less alcohol -- and calories, if anyone cares.  This 7% alcohol wine is light, effervescent, and built for all-day drinking in the sun.  (Not that I ever do that, of course....)  Pour it over ice and add a few slices of lime to make it more festive, Argentine tincho-style. Another wine to pick up by the case when it's in stock.  

Top Secret Oenotri Pizza Annex

Last weekend I had the great good fortune of wandering into pure Cru Wine Experience in Napa's West End.  This contemporary tasting room for  Mitch Cosentino's pure Cru wines opened in July in the Napa Square business complex on First Street, just across from the former AVIA Hotel (now Andaz). 

"Purety" is a Sauvignon Blanc/Semillon blend,
yours for only $22/bottle. Purety awesome.

With its comfortable leather seating, this place looks more like a wine bar than a traditional tasting room -- think leather armchairs, bar tables, tall barstools, and a flatscreen behind the bar.  The menu also lends itself to more of a wine lounge experience, letting you uncork any of the red and white pure Cru wines to drink there by the bottle (at retail cost!), and offering nearly all of them by the glass for $8-17.  Small $5 plates of mixed nuts, chocolate truffles, and my beloved Castelveltrano olives round out their offerings.  Since they're open from 11am-9pm Wednesday and Thursday, and from 11am-11pm on Friday and Saturday night, they're also an awesome option to consider once the rest of the tasting room world has shut down.

But as the title of this post may have given away, pure Cru also offers guests sitting in their comfortable leather chairs the sublime culinary stylings of Oenotri restaurant -- pure Cru's deservedly famous and perpetually packed Napa Square neighbor just fifteen steps away. 

That's right... you no longer have to reserve weeks in advance, or battle a barful of canny locals to sample the legendary pizzas, antipasti, and charcuterie from Curtis Di Fede and Tyler Rodde.  Just score a seat at pure Cru during Oenotri's open hours, and you're good to go!  Obviously the restaurant's full menu is not available there -- and neither is any of their wine list  -- but you can enjoy enough of that Oenotri poetry to make a fabulous rustic Italian meal.  And, by another stroke of divine intervention, winemaker Mitch Cosentino happens to make several delicious Sangiovese-based blends under the pure Cru label that should pair outrageously with those pizzas and cured meats.

THIS IS HUGE, folks.  I'm completely obsessed with Oenotri's pizzas, but unless I can time it just right at the bar, I rarely manage to score one any time I want to.  But since pure Cru just opened recently, it pretty much always has seats available... at least for now.  This Oenotri collaboration is a new thing, and may put an end to that easy availability in a hurry.  Until it does, though, I plan to take full advantage of this top-secret Oenotri pizza annex, and I urge my loyal readers to do the same.

The Handbook For Badasstic Country Ladies

Last weekend I discovered a new consignment store in downtown Napa with a fabulous collection of historic toys, sports memorabilia, and random old books.  The deceptively generic-sounding Napa Valley Buy & Sell is on First Street between Coombs and Randolph, and offers hours of entertainment to those willing to paw through the wares--particularly the books about food and sexuality.  These two departments were spectacularly well developed, making it clear that someone in charge over there has a penchant for the fun stuff. 

I scored two remarkable treasures on my first visit, for the princely sum of $4.32 total (including tax). The first was a 1961 hardcover edition of The Escoffier Cook Book, but the second was an even more exciting relic from another time and place: the 1888 edition of Maison Rustique des Dames, by Madame Millet-Robinet. This copy is in amazing shape considering its age, and came with a bonus prize inside: two carefully pressed four leaf clovers hidden within its 636 onion-skin pages.

Since this 1888 version was the 13th edition, I'm guessing the book was wildly popular back in the day.  A quick perusal of the table of contents for this two-volume hardcover reveals why.  (Note: this book is written in 1888 French, so forgive any inaccuracies in my 21st Century translations)

Part One discusses basic household maintenance, covering such essentials as how to hire your maids; how to put your kids to work on the farm; managing household expenses; bread baking; window washing; the care and cleaning of furs; preserving meats (including a subsection entitled "Method of killing and preparing the pig"); preserving vegetables; stocking the wine cellar; and an entire chapter dedicated to colognes and perfumes.  Bien sûr.  These ladies may have been in the country, but it seems that didn't stop them from living pret-ty darn well... the wines suggested by the author include such domaines as Romanée Conti and Lafite, for example.

Part Two is a Manual of Cookery, outlining different types of service style, basic knife techniques, and a wealth of presentation and garnish ideas.  Distinct chapters on hors d'oeuvres, meat, game, fish, vegetables, purées (presumably so popular that they deserve their own chapter), fried dishes (same), doughs, desserts, pastries, and an authoritative "List of foods that may be served for lunch" provide invaluable guidance to the country hostess with the mostess.

 Part Three, incredibly, includes a medical encyclopedia and covers topics ranging from what to include in the medicine cabinet, all the way to formal pronouncements of death. 


Engraving 116: "Goat in harness"



Part Four delves into all the various types of gardens one might desire, and Part Five gets down and dirty on the Farm... articulating the essentials of farm buildings, staffing, and proper feeding of the staff (which the book stresses at length), as well as the care and feeding of an array of different breeds of chickens, turkeys, geese, ducks, pigeons, rabits, cattle, dairy animals, sheep, pigs, goats, and bees.  There's even a chapter on how to drive a horse-drawn carriage and tend your horse while traveling long distances in all manner of weather conditions. Tip: always light a lantern on your carriage right after sunset, or risk a fine of 15 francs if the police catch you.

The  book is full of priceless advice like this.  I'm thinking I need to translate and share the choicest passages and recipes on this blog to celebrate the pearls of wisdom Madame Millet-Robinet had to share with badasstic country ladies over 120 years ago.  Who knows how much of it might still be invaluable to modern "ladies" in rural communities like the Napa Valley?

Choosing where to begin, though, is gonna be tough... maybe "Management of a Dinner Party," where all the rules of engagement and feasting are made clear? Or perhaps "Enraged or Venimous Animal Bites And Insect Stings," sure to be a thrilling read full of terrifying medical advice....

Regardless of where I begin, this quirky little tome contains an embarassment of riches, and I cannot wait to taste them.